{"id":148,"date":"2021-06-09T22:18:00","date_gmt":"2021-06-10T02:18:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/?p=148"},"modified":"2021-06-12T18:23:06","modified_gmt":"2021-06-12T22:23:06","slug":"fat-cat-goes-slap-this-funky-rapper-has-a-herniated-disc","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/?p=148","title":{"rendered":"Fat Cat Goes Slap! This Funky Rapper Has a Herniated Disc"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter size-large is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/upload.wikimedia.org\/wikipedia\/commons\/3\/37\/Recording_a_concert_%28Unsplash%29.jpg\" alt=\"Someone holding up a cell phone at a concert\" width=\"552\" height=\"367\"\/><figcaption>veeterzy veeterzy, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons<\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>Jimbo Jankers also known as Fat Cat is the hottest rapper in the game and suffered a hilarious injury this past July.\u00a0 Jankers was freestyling by his pool when he slipped and fell, causing a fragment of his disc nucleus to be pushed into his spinal canal, causing a rupture is his annulus.\u00a0 No other rapper suffers as much debilitating pain and he is not going to let you forget it.\u00a0 He released his new hit single \u201cMy Back Hurts\u201d ahead of his upcoming album \u201cSpine Thyme\u201d.\u00a0 The controversial album is rumored to be the first in a new genre called quantum funk.\u00a0 The multi-dimensional sound of quantum allows for the construction of visual music. &#8220;It&#8217;s like mushrooms from my vocal chords. You&#8217;ll never hear anything like it&#8221; exclaimed the Kanye West understudy. \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Jankers funded a conservative Washington D.C. think tank, whom he tasked with developing quantum funk.\u00a0 He needed a better way to communicate the anguish his herniated disc causes him daily.\u00a0 Spine Thyme\u2019s tracks promise to bring wicked, anatomically accurate visual representations of the rapper\u2019s skeletal and muscular systems, both before and after his goof by the pool.\u00a0 Fans are excited to fully understand what kind of spine this hot tamale is walking around with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The album has been met with some backlash over its preorder perks.&nbsp; Anyone who preorders Spine Thyme will receive a free herniated disc of their own from Jankers or one of his staff.&nbsp; Medical experts are warning that this might not be the path to enlightenment that the superstar wordsmith purports.&nbsp; These criticisms are amplified by the lack of scientific research into the benefits of the injury. &nbsp;Some critics also claim that the rapper\u2019s slogan \u201cInjuring your back is better than crack\u201d may be a harmful message for young people.&nbsp; The aching rapper responded by saying that \u201cIf you\u2019re life is too good you gotta give yourself some pain or you\u2019ll have nothing to rap about\u201d.&nbsp; &nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jimbo Jankers also known as Fat Cat is the hottest rapper in the game and suffered a hilarious injury this past July.  Jankers was freestyling by his pool&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[97],"tags":[139,138,141,140,18],"class_list":["post-148","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-articles","tag-herniated-disc","tag-injury","tag-music","tag-quantum-funk","tag-rap","entry","double"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/148","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=148"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/148\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":157,"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/148\/revisions\/157"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=148"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=148"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/paperslop.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=148"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}